


Sam's First Wedding

by vanillafluffy



Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Alternate Canon, Clergymen, Gen, Public Speaking, Throw canon in a blender and hit puree, Wedding, first wedding
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-03
Updated: 2016-10-03
Packaged: 2018-08-19 07:18:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,276
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8195632
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/vanillafluffy/pseuds/vanillafluffy
Summary: Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today to marry off Maria and Bucky.... Sam Wilson is qualified to perform weddings. He just wants to get this one over with.





	

There is a sea of faces in front of him, some looking toward the pulpit, some not. Sam feels queasy. Thinks, _I'm officiating this wedding?! Holy shit. How the hell did this happen?!_

It's his own fault; he should never have mentioned becoming a mail-order minister a few years ago. All it took was a modest "donation", and poof! He was a member of the clergy. Mostly he'd done it to please his granny when she was on the decline. Riley had laughed his ass off when he found out and took to calling him 'Brother Wilson". It's not like he's a real chaplain or anything like that. He's certainly never performed a wedding--until now. 

Steve, the best man, stands beside the groom. He's the one who'd seized on the tidbit about Sam's clerical qualifications and suggested he be the one to solemnize the vows between Bucky and Maria--though Steve is the only one allowed to call him that. 

It's fairly textbook psych--after everything Barnes has been through, no wonder he doesn't relate to his youthful nickname. He introduces himself as "JB" these days, although Sam has heard the bride-to-be address him as James. 

The three of them, along with Tony and Clint, are waiting for the bridal processional to start down the aisle. Tony is wearing sunglasses, probably still hungover from the bachelor party the day before, no surprise there. Eighteen hours in Atlantic City...Sam had only had a couple drinks, Steve and JB _can't_ get drunk, but Tony and Clint? Yikes. Tony's new nickname is "Iron Liver". They'd been so busy wrangling him, they hadn't noticed when Clint disappeared. 

Steve and Sam had finally found him in a bar playing darts. They'd gotten him back to the limo, where JB was waiting with Tony--Clint had been singing the whole time. Admittedly, the guy has a pretty good voice, but Cracklin' Rosie? Neil freaking Diamond? Wow. Then, during the drive home, Steve asked Clint what was in his bulging pockets. Sam figured he'd maybe snagged some miniature bottles from the minibar in their suite, but no. Clint pulled fistfuls of cash out. Apparently he'd cleaned out the bar playing darts...totally shit-faced but still couldn't miss a target....

The ceremony is taking place on the helipad of Avengers Tower, attended mostly by coworkers of the couple; both of them are fairly short on relatives. JB has a sister (too frail to attend), a niece and a grand-nephew. Maria has no one, at least none she's in touch with. 

The small orchestra begins playing "Ode to Joy", the sprightly strains echoing out over Manhattan. The attendants begin floating toward them. Pepper ends up with Tony, Wanda Maximoff is paired with Clint, and finally Natasha, as maid of honor, takes her place with Steve. 

There's a hush, then Pachbel's Canon begins, and Maria Hill appears. 

JB's indrawn breath could be because his bride is so beautiful, or it could be because she's being escorted down the aisle by Nick Fury. 

She does look good, Sam has to admit. And it's a nice dress. It's not one of those overdone gowns you could slipcover a Buick with. It moves like liquid mercury in the late afternoon light and skims Maria's trim figure, highlighting how beautiful she is. JB is one lucky guy. 

Sam sneaks a glance at the groom, who is staring down the aisle with--tenderness? pride? love? All those things. For sure, Sam's never seen him look so happy. 

When the bride and her escort reach the altar, JB gazes at her and murmurs. "You're so beautiful."

"It's a beautiful dress," she replies. "I love it. Thank you."

Up close, the mercury-slimmer is the effect of a gazillion tiny beads. A design of lattice and roses stands out from the smoky-silver fabric of the dress. The bottom hem is a fringe of delicate beads. 

Sam begins to speak. The wireless microphone clipped to the collar of his plain dark suit broads every word to the assembled guests. 

No one interrupts with a reason why they shouldn't be wed, and it's going well...until he gets to the part about, "Who gives this woman to be married?"

"This woman is fully capable of deciding who she wants to marry," Nick Fury booms in a voice that carries clearly without amplification. "Furthermore, that's some damn archaic verbiage, because it's been a hundred and fifty years or so since it was legal to barter people in this country. I'm just here for moral support."

"Thank you, Nick." The bride is trying to control giggles, but the look she gives her former boss is one of fondness. 

Fury turns toward the crowd, where a front row seat is waiting for him, then he wheels back. "And you," he roars at the groom. "If you don't treat her right, I can assure you--I will end you, and they will never...find ...your body. Is that clear?"

JB is neither insulted nor intimidated. He has the audacity to grin. "Crystal."

Fury lumbers to his reserved seat and lowers himself carefully onto the delicate chair. 

Sam exhales as quietly as he can. _That was intense._ He gives the reading they've selected, then his notes just have the word "Remarks". He'd planned to work on that part yesterday, but the never-ending bachelor party had interfered. Now he's on the spot. 

"I've known the bride and groom for a couple of years...since before they met each other, actually. The first time I met the bride, she literally saved my life. The first time I met the groom, he literally tried to kill me. So I was really surprised when the two of them hit it off and got together--" JB is giving him a look that suggests history may repeat itself if he doesn't get on with it. "--which just goes to show that love can work wonders."

The rest of the ceremony is cookie-cutter standard: rings, vows--"Do you, James Buchanan Barnes, take this woman, Maria Grace Hill--"

They don't wait for him to tell them to kiss. They melt into each other's embrace, exchanging tender kisses. They finally break it off when the cheers reach a decibel that could be heard in Jersey. They really are an attractive couple. Sam smiles. "Ladies and gentleman, may I present Mr. and Mrs. Barnes!"

More cheers. The orchestra plays something he vaguely recognizes, JB and Maria waltz up the aide, followed by their attendants, and Sam is off the hook. 

He dawdles for a moment. Unclips the boutonnière mike. Straitens the papers in the portfolio he'd stashed them in. If he doesn't get held up by the throngs, he can probably slip away to his appointment long enough to drop everything off and not have to keep and eye on it all evening. 

"I wasn't trying to bust your chops," Nick Fury announces, materializing beside the altar. "I just happen to take exception to the idea of the most competent person I've ever worked with being objectified like that."

"That was my first wedding," Sam confesses. "I was just following the script, it never occurred to me...."

"Understood." Fury looks toward the doors that open into the Great Room where cocktail hour is taking place. ""Shall we go toast the happy couple?"

The event crew, in tidy grey coveralls, is swiftly doing a teardown of the ceremony space, moving chairs from their rows and placing them around tables. There's no reason for him to stay out here, so he follows Fury inside to the party. 

He made it through officiating at his first wedding. Sam definitely feels like celebrating. 

...


End file.
